The Tattler

The Tattler

John and Jane Parents 1 v. Montgomery County Board of Education: Parents Challenge School Support Plans for Trans Students
John and Jane Parents 1 v. Montgomery County Board of Education: Parents Challenge School Support Plans for Trans Students
June 14, 2024

On May 20, 2024, the Supreme Court of the United States denied a Maryland parents’ petition that challenged school support plans for trans...

Track and Field season comes to an end.
Track and Field: Road to Nationals
June 12, 2024

Though the school year is winding down, Track and Field is not. They attended the MPSSAA 4A Track and Field State Championships from May 21 through...

Lockdowns are becoming increasingly common country-wide.
Life in Lockdown
June 12, 2024

With lockdowns becoming increasingly more common around the country, the chilling reality of these incidents has recently hit close to home for...

Rivalries at BCC.
The Importance of Rivalries
June 11, 2024

For better or for worse, rivalries are a huge part of the game for B-CC athletic teams. Not only do rivalries promote school spirit and motivate...

Pitcher of the Year: Henry Eichner
Pitcher of the Year: Henry Eichner
June 11, 2024

Henry Eichner took home the Division 1 Pitcher of the Year award to cap off an incredible junior season. Eichner led B-CC’s elite pitching...

Varsity Girls Basketball took the court at the State Championship.
A Year in Review of Baron Sports
June 11, 2024

Athletic Director Mr. Krawczel is pleased with the results of the school’s athletes this year. Looking back on 2023-2024, though, he was less...

Check out drive-in movies across the DMV
Coming To a Field Near You...
June 7, 2024

With summer kicking off, students wonder what they should do with their friends. Between pool days and going to museums in DC, a fun and unique...

Nasty Ogre Captures Dr. Mooney

Late last night, fear gripped the B-CC community after an anonymous source confirmed that a nasty ogre has captured Dr. Mooney.
Photo+of+Ogre+
Wren Buehler
Photo of Ogre

Late last night, fear gripped the B-CC community after an anonymous source confirmed that a nasty ogre has captured Dr. Mooney. Security footage indicates that, during a late-night planning session in the main office, the nasty ogre grabbed our principal, put him in a sack, and chuckled maliciously to himself before disappearing into the mysterious labyrinth below the E-Wing basement. We sent our dungeon correspondent, Sir Leon of Bethesdica, to pursue them deep into the caverns.

Though the nasty ogre had a significant head start, Leon made quick progress, unhindered by enormous spiders, devious goblins, and bloodthirsty freshmen. He soon found the nasty ogre, and was surprised to find that Dr. Mooney had forged a deep kinship with it. 

“Honestly,” said Dr. Mooney, “the nasty ogre and I were able to find common ground. We both have difficult jobs managing a lot of ungrateful people — it’s just that I help teenagers get an education, and he rules a subterranean kingdom of trolls through military power.” The nasty ogre grunted in agreement.

Asked if he wanted to return to the surface, Mooney wavered. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love education and all that, but if you’d read the emails I get from parents…” Mooney grew silent. “I’m staying with the ogre.”

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Our correspondent asked him to reconsider, but he refused. “I can start over here. Build a new school. No emails. No bad news. I belong to the subterranean world now…” Mooney paused. “I’ll miss you all.”

Wormwood Caverns High School will be open in time for the 2024-2025 school year.

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